I’ve discovered the pleasure of talking to myself. To avoid being called crazy, I simply refer to this new pleasure as “thinking out loud”. Or, if Volver our cat is present, I pretend to be talking to him. Because I do talk to him all the time although the tone of voice I use when we cuddle is not the same as that when I reprimand him for whining for more food. It’s not the words that he understands but the tone.

Men (who are not good listeners to begin with) may be more willing to listen if the tone is right. Some research indicates that men prefer women with high-pitched, breathy voices that stroll when they talk. Women, however, prefer Barry White like voices that wrap themselves around the ear and make you want to snuggle. But this changes with age. Men begin having difficulties hearing high frequencies and women difficulties with low ones. So, to be heard, it’s best to moderate your tone.

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Related: Do Men and Women Hear Sounds Differently?