Effie or Effigy?

Grosvenor Gallery

Sir Coutts Lindsay and his wealthy Rothschild wife, Blanche, were both amateur artists who’d aspired for more. What they didn’t have in terms of talent, they made up for in terms of money. So in 1877 they opened The Grosvenor Gallery in London focusing on artists snubbed by the mainstream. One such artist was James Abbott Whistler, a snob himself who turned his nose up at paintings expressing sentiments and morals. Art, he’d said, should exist only for the sake of art. Hugh and I didn’t really agree however we went to his exhibition at the Grosvenor with great enthusiasm. Whistler’s compositions were severe and his use of colour melancholic.

Whistler's Mother

One painting that stood out was a portrait of his mother seated within a geometric space that was all grey and black and undecided white. The mother’s hands were folded on her lap as if they’d never caressed a face, ruffled someone’s hair, or wiped a tear away. No wonder Whistler’s art was so formal.

While there we saw the art critic John Ruskin with his bushy eyebrows and lunatic glares busy scribbling notes and making faces. His vibes were so bad that it came as no surprise when we later read his savage review about Whistler’s work. Ruskin accused the artist of being a dandy audacious enough to ask outrageous sums of money simply for having flung a pot of paint in the public’s face. Whistler was incensed and sued Ruskin for libel.

It was all very exciting as it reanimated gossip about Ruskin. Everyone in the art world knew that Ruskin had once been married to Effie Gray, John Everett Millais’ wife. But the marriage had been annulled due to Ruskin’s “incurable impotency”. And when Millais and Effie married, Ruskin began to violently criticize the artist’s paintings.

Ruskin on the Rocks

Since Millais, being one of the founders of the Pre-Raphaelite Brotherhood, was not popular with the status quo, Hugh thought that having him paint my portrait would be a form of activism. So it was arranged that two or three times a week I would go to Millais’ studio on Palace Gate and pose for my portrait. The room was big with tapestries on the walls, several paintings on easels, and a stack of ornate frames leaning up against the wall.

Tea Time

After posing, Millais’ wife Effie would generally offer me tea and crumpets. Eventually we became friends. She was so very middle-aged, normal, and grounded that talking came easily. It took a few months but we began to exchange confidences and she then told me the story about her marriage to Ruskin.

Ruskin and Effie had met when she was just a young girl with no sentimental experience. Ruskin said he was in love and wanted to marry her despite his mother’s objections. On their honeymoon night, Ruskin took one look at his bride’s body and refused to have sex with her. Effie said her pubic hair had repulsed him. The only naked women Ruskin knew were statues and they were hairless.

Naked or Nude

This went on for six years until Effie’s friends Elizabeth Eastlake stepped in. Elizabeth, an art historian and critic, liked fresh flowers, Mendelssohn, and stern judgements. She didn’t like Germans, naughty books or John Ruskin. Elizabeth, with the help of others, convinced Effie to seek annulment on the basis that her marriage had not been consummated. Ruskin said his wife was mad but there wasn’t much he could say after a doctor certified her as a virgin. So Effie finally got rid of Ruskin and the following year married Millais. The two had eight children together.

Meanwhile, Ruskin asked Rose La Touche, his drawing student 30 years his junior, to marry him. Instinctively, Rose didn’t trust Ruskin so she wrote his ex-wife for advice. Effie told the young girl of the difficulties she had had with Ruskin so Rose refused to marry him.

Ruskin and Seances

But Rose had her own problems. She was anorexic and died a few years later. At that point the dam was broken and Ruskin became obviously wacky. Desperate over the loss of Rose, he began going to spiritualists hoping to re-establish communication with his lost love. Now there was no doubt about it. Ruskin was mad.

If beauty is in the eyes of the beholder, beware of the beholder.

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Tea & the Spanish Steps

Spanish Steps

Right next to Rome’s Spanish Steps is the Babington Tea Room. It was established in 1893 by Isabel Cargill and Anna Maria Babington. They, like many other ex-pats, came to Rome in hopes of creating a new lifestyle for themselves. Obviously, they catered to the Anglo-Saxon community. The Brits adored the place as it was practically the only place, at the time, to get a nice hot cup of tea.

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Tallulah Bankhead and Insomnia

Tallulah Bankhead's Insomnia

Tallulah Bankhead suffered from insomnia. It was easier for her to fall asleep if one of her gay friends held her hand. Their contact worked better than drugs.

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The Power of Intention

Smoke in the Eyes

Sometimes it’s difficult to focus when smoke is blown into our face. Sometimes we are the ones doing the blowing. Sometimes we are distracted from what we need to do because our intentions are not clear.

In the Age of Reconfiguration, I realize that I can accomplish more if I give my day an intention. It helps if the night before I write down what my plans are for the next day–it helps to keep me from being swallowed up by distractions.

The power of intention is that it understands that the shortest distance from one point to another is a straight line.

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Know Thyself

Boo!

While standing in front of the mirror, who do I see? Sometimes it’s her, sometimes it’s me. This morning “Her” was staring at me. So I said “Boo!” and she said “Boo!”, too. That’s when BOOM! I realized, that she was actually me. Because there are two me’s—the one I use to be and the one I am now. Feeling out of sync, I decided to consult the Priestess Pythia and took a boat to Piraeus where I had a tough time getting a donkey to Delphi.

Know Thyself

Over the door of Delphi’s temple was the inscription “Know Thyself”. The line to get in was long but finally I got to meet with Pythia. She was sitting over a crack in a rock moaning and saying nonsensical phrases. Finally she looked at me and said: “Adapt and go on.”

Priestess Pythia

It seemed like too cryptic a response. But the last donkey back to Piraeus was about to leave and there was no time for questions. I had no choice but to leave and reflect on Pythia’s advice.

Donkey to Pireaus

Riding on a donkey while trying to reflect on existential problems is not an easy thing to do as the bumps are distracting. But, once home, I made a dedicated effort to figure out how to “Adapt and go on.”

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(excerpt from “Cool Breeze, the Age of Reconfiguration” ©)

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