We are living in the Age of Dehumanization where respect for one’s dignity and integrity has been obliterated. It’s a world that has become hostile and alienating leaving many of us feeling overwhelmed and impotent. So what can we do?
Marcus Aurelius (121–180 AD) wrote that there is no safer refuge to retreat to than one’s own soul, the Fortress Within. Because inside your fortress, outside events can’t harm your core unless you open the door to let them in. Once you realize that you have power over your mind but not over outside events, continues Aurelius, you will find your strength. True freedom comes not from changing the world around you but from fortifying your inner space.
To construct an inner fortress, it’s important to discipline our emotional responses. In “Meditations” (Book 8, 48), Aurelius writes that “the mind without passions is a fortress; no place is more secure.” By passions he means destructive emotions such as anger, hatred, envy, and despair that can overpower reason because “it’s not events that upset us but our opinions about them.”
A good approach towards this self-discipline is learning to pause after you’ve been emotionally triggered. During this pause, switch from automatic to autonomous, from emotional to rational thinking, before reacting. When you’ve learned to do this, all you have to do when the world gets too crazy and chaotic is seek refuge in your inner fortress where you are the one in control.
“The happiness of your life depends upon the quality of your thoughts” says Aurelius. But where do these thoughts come from? Immanuel Kant tells us to “have the courage to use your own understanding”. Many people, writes Kant, are victims of self-imposed immaturity because they stay mentally dependent on others not because they lack intelligence but because they lack the resolve to think without a guide. Thinking for yourself requires the courage to ask questions so you can come to your own conclusions.
Thoughts are building blocks. The better quality of thoughts you construct with, the stronger your fortress will be.
We have the power to eliminate many superfluous troubles simply by editing our thoughts. This will also give us more space for personal reflection. Because each one of us needs to find our place in the universe.
“Find out who you are then do it on purpose.” Dolly Parton
Since her death, I’ve watched several Dolly Parton videos. The more videos I saw, the more I said to myself: if anyone knew how to create a Fortress Within, it was Dolly.
Dolly was born in rural Tennessee. Her dad was a sharecropper and the family was poor. She was one of 12 siblings so momma, Avie Lee, was busy but never too busy to sing. Avie Lee’s dad was a Pentecostal preacher and the kids were in church on Sundays. It was here that Dolly first performed. It was here that Dolly began constructing her fortress.
Because, as seen with the women of Gee’s Bend, singing at church gatherings helps develop feelings of self-affirmation. And the more Dolly sang, the more she understood who she was and where her place in the world was.
Although money poor, the Parton family was not love poor. Nevertheless, love won’t keep you warm in the winter. Dolly didn’t have a coat so her mom took some fabric scraps she’d been given and made Dolly a coat. While sewing on the coat, Avie Lee told Dolly the biblical story of how Jacob had given his son Joseph a coat of many colors (Genesis 37:11). Dolly felt really special because she, too, now had a coat like someone from the Bible and proudly wore it to school. But when her classmates made fun of her coat, Dolly couldn’t understand why. She told her classmates of how every stitch had been sewn with her mother’s love making her coat of many colors worth more than all their clothes put together. “But they didn’t understand it and I tried to make them see, that one is only poor only if they choose to be.”
Dolly didn’t let the external world decide who she was because, thanks to her Fortress Within, she decided for herself.
Dolly often talked about how she and her family lived in the country but would occasionally go into town. Here, on one of her rare contacts with the outside world, Dolly saw a woman with puffed up blonde hair, big breasts, red lips, red nails, high heel shoes, and a tight dress. Dolly thought she was the most beautiful woman in the world and told her mom so. Her mom’s response was “she’s trash”. But that didn’t keep Dolly from thinking the woman was beautiful and that she wanted to be “trash”, too. And that explains Dolly’s fashion style. Years later, Dolly was interviewed by Barbara Walters. Walters was very condescending and asked Dolly questions like “When I think of hillbillies, am I thinking of your kind of people?”, “Don’t you ever feel that you’re a joke?” and “You’re so beautiful. You don’t have to look like this.” Dolly, despite Walter’s nastiness, didn’t lose her cool. She told Walters that she knew exactly what she was doing. And that she was sure of herself and of her talent. Furthermore, continued Dolly, “I don’t like to be like everyone else. I would never stoop so low as to be fashionable because that’s the easiest thing in the world to do.” Boom.
In all the videos I’ve seen related to her, I’ve never seen Dolly get defensive or snarky. You know why? Because her inner citadel was well nourished and strong. Dolly’s power was that she stayed close to her core.
How we see ourselves influences so many of the choices that we make. Dolly saw herself as a star and became one.
It’s become increasingly more difficult for me to integrate my vibes with those of internet and technology. I am bothered by: the constant “updates” that throw my routine out of whack, the lack of an alternative to Photoshop forcing me to “edit” images with an iPhone, the continual push towards AI and all its evils, the ALT TEXT that doesn’t help the visually impaired as much as it does AI grifting, and the payments for an internet connection that has difficulties connecting.
Related:
Know Thyself + Marcus Aurelius (121 AD – 180 AD) + Diary Writing and other Spiritual Practices
Dolly Parton Shuts Down Patronising Interview In Style + What Would Dolly Do?… Emotion, Discipline and Dolly Parton
“We’re all pieces of God and we all have that little God light inside of us.” Dolly Parton
The Narrative Within 